December is often so busy, meals, work events, people wanting to meet up, Christmas play to attend at the school, buying presents, all the food all the food and the planning of getting it all done. If you're working as well, wrapping things up in time for finishing for the Christmas holidays.
Are you still breathing after reading that introduction?
Is it making you wonder if you have enough space in your diary? Are there enough hours in the day? Is the pressure of wanting to do everything causing you stress?
The power of saying NO
Here's how the power to say no can help you. This way you are looking after you, and your emotional wellbeing.
I do get that you probably want to do everything, but you aren't superhuman.
But I can't say no! I hear you thinking
- Won't people think I'm being rude/no fun
- I've managed to juggle it all in the past
- I'll miss out if I say no
If you've juggled and managed in the past, how did you feel during the busy time and at the end when it was all over?
If you do say no, you have space in your diary for relaxation, take that time for YOU, if you can.
Saying no is also setting a boundary which can be empowering and shows others that you value your time and yourself.
If there is something you think would be too much fun to miss out on, then prioritise that fun thing. You need fun and joy in your life.
Trying to do it all and say yes to everything could lead you to burn out before the big day. Giving yourself too much to do and stretching yourself too thinly could lead you to complete exhaustion.
Help with saying "no" that feels more manageable for you
You don't need to be rude about saying no. Stay firm but be kind and polite.
"Thank you but I already have commitments"
If you do want to meet up with a person or group of people, suggest doing it in the new year when you have more time.
Give yourself some time to think and review what you have on
"Let me check my diary/schedule and get back to you"
I mentioned above about finding time for fun and joy. Make sure that you prioritise things that light you up and make you feel good.
If you're still concerned you might not be able to say n, give it a bit of practice. Role play with your kids or a friend and just practice what you'd say. The more you do it, the more comfortable you'll become at saying it.
Pushbacks from others
What bout those people who then try and guilt trip me?
There may be people who still want you involved and try and get you to change your mind. It's lovely to be wanted but remember to stand your ground.
Remember that saying no is for your benefit. To get control of your time and energy.
Choose quality over quantity as much as you possibly can.
By learning to say no, you open the door to a more intentional, joyful and controlled experience overall.
Have a wonderful, less stress Christmas, however you choose to celebrate it.
Below is my blog I wrote last year if you want some additional help on stress relief this time of year.
Coping with Christmas: Practical Tips for Managing Seasonal Stress
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